Fear

Inga Krastina holding a SnakeLet me tell you straight – before you freak out of this photo or wonder if I’m not a bit too weird, know that I would definitely think Im crazy if I did it a few days before the event. It was conference about kundalini (that’s the energy that lies dormant in all of us, energy we are born with) in Brighton in April. I knew there would be a speaker who explored the symbolism of snakes and I also knew that she would bring alive snakes. I didn’t give much thought to it, as obviously my mind decided to avoid the subject at all. I don’t like snakes and am afraid of them. So when the Kwali Kumara brought two quite big snakes out of the basket, I was happy I was at the back of the room and didn’t have any desire to go closer for the rest of the day. However, she spoke with such love about them that I got curious. When Kumara asked if there was anyone afraid of the snakes in the room, I, to my embarrassment, was the only one who raised the hand. So I had invitation to make contact with the snakes during the break and try to overcome my fear.
That was really strange – I still was afraid when approached them during the break, but at the same time felt attracted and very curious. The first contact was just touching the serpent while it was on somebody else’s arms. I closed my eyes and stretched out my hand. To my amazement I felt something warm and very pleasant. It was the snake! And it was not cold, sleazy and something disgusting as I expected. (And where did I have all these ideas how the snake should feel?) The next contact was already with my eyes open and longer. To be on the safe side, I, however, made sure again that this beautiful serpent is not hungry. I also received guidance to breathe, calm myself down as my nervousness and agitation would be the reason the snake wouldn’t appreciate contact with me. Then I did it – slowly and like in a dance the serpent was put around my neck. I could feel her fully – slowly sliding along my back and arms, exploring the being she was with. It felt really exciting and at the same time peaceful and beautiful!
If you are interested in kundalini yoga conference, it’s possible to watch all the speakers online. Here’s the link
If after this meeting I met the same serpent somewhere in the wilds, in the forest or park, I’m sure I would freak out again. But I consider it a victory over my fears. Isn’t that’s how we grow – step by step building new habits, understanding the existing ones and challenging ourselves?
There can be fears that really serve us – what we experience when there are real threats, for instance, wild tigers or bears chasing us. All our system is then mobilized to fight for our lives, or to flight. However, how often in our modern times we would encounter situations like that? How often our lives are really under threats? This is where other type of fears – fears that do not serve us, come in. They are created by our mind because we make assumptions based on our past conditioning. Yet, the reaction in our body is the same in both cases. That itself is quite a scary thought.
Powerful way to identify your deepest fears is to ask the question ‘What is the worst thing that can happen if…?’ For instance, if you are afraid that you are not able to meet deadlines of the project, ask ‘What is the worst thing that can happen if I don’t?’ Let’s assume the answer is ‘My boss would be so angry with me’. Ask again – ‘What is the worst thing that can happen if he is angry?’
  • ‘He might fire me’
  • ‘What is the worst thing that can happen then?’
  • ‘I would lose my salary, wouldn’t be able to pay bills and was under the bridge in short time’
  • ‘What is the worst thing that can happen then?’
  • ‘I would consider myself a total failure, would lose all my self respect’
Eventually you come to your deepest fears. They might be so different from the initial statement. By recognizing, identifying these fears you are already half way to releasing them.
Yesterday, 3rd of April I had a chance to make a contact with the snake again. It was quite brief as there were many people who wanted to give it a try, but I found that I was not afraid anymore. Here I am all happy! So this is how it works – you feel the fear and do it anyway!
Blessings,
Inga

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